Apposite Aparici

Right now very few companies on the planet can match Aparici’s 2017/18 portfolio for sheer inventiveness, humour, tone, texture and graphic joie de vivre. Continue reading Apposite Aparici

Novoceram’s Naughty Nightcrawler

In Novoceram animated Gifs to promote the new Jasper range, a thief, picked up by CCTV cameras, prefers to steal Jasper Malt, Ivoire and Gris tiles, rather than other precious items nearby, such as a chest full of jewels, a precious painted masterpiece or the content of a restaurant’s cash register. Continue reading Novoceram’s Naughty Nightcrawler

ABK's Wide&Style launch event

Interactive Installation

ABK’s Wide&Style displays a kaleidoscope of graphic effects that stand out for their taste, style and inspiration. Based on the creativity of young designers, graphic artists and illustrators, these products are capable of transforming spaces with an artistic and original touch. Continue reading Interactive Installation

Tiling Thesaurus: I

I’m away on holiday until the 13th February, so I’ll leave you with some tile humour. Well, it may be humour! Installation: Catch all term used to describe all aspects of tile fixing, but in fact sticking six tiles above the bathroom basin. Beloved of fixers wishing to project an up-market image. Interior designer: High trained (should that be strung?, Ed) individual able to grasp … Continue reading Tiling Thesaurus: I

Tiling Thesaurus: H

I’m away on holiday until the 13th February, so I’ll leave you with some tile humour. Well, it may be humour! Hand made: A second. The retailer’s wet dream; a concept allowing the poorest quality tiles to be sold at the highest possible prices Handi packs: A misnomer, if ever there was one. Hermetically-sealed box, at one time believed to hold tiles, designed specifically to … Continue reading Tiling Thesaurus: H

Tiling Thesaurus: G

I’m away on holiday until the 13th February, so I’ll leave you with some tile humour. Well, it may be humour! Glass Blocks: The ideal solution for the customer who can’t find a single tile they like. Glass Mosaic: Tiny bits of waste glass rejected by the double glazing trade and therefore sold at ridiculous prices. Held together by brown paper, or strips of old … Continue reading Tiling Thesaurus: G

Tiling Thesaurus: D

I’m away on holiday until the 13th February, so I’ll leave you with some tile humour. Well, it may be humour! Dado: “Could I interest you in one of these, Madam.” Decor: Plain tiles with a consistent visible fault. Description: Product specification characterised by its complete absence from all tile boxes and price lists. Design: Someone else’s idea with your name on it. Displays: Obsolete; … Continue reading Tiling Thesaurus: D

Tiling Thesaurus: F

I’m away on holiday until the 13th February, so I’ll leave you with some tile humour. Well, it may be humour! Fair: Spanish or Italian exhibition where British distributors can order newly discontinued tiles while getting pissed and improving their golf handicap. Failure: Nothing to do with me. See Architect, Agent, Distributor, Fixer and Manufacturer. Flexible: Term used to describe written quotation produced by any … Continue reading Tiling Thesaurus: F

Tiling Thesaurus: E

I’m away on holiday until the 13th February, so I’ll leave you with some tile humour. Well, it may be humour! Ecu: Form of currency used in the Brussels’ edition of Monopoly. Emu: Long legged chickens reared by farmers keen to maximise grant awards from Common Agricultural Policy. Encaustic: Obsolete term used to describe site foreman’s sense of humour. Standard tiling specification for all building … Continue reading Tiling Thesaurus: E

Tile Humour: Euphemistically Speaking

I’m away on holiday until the 13th February, so I’ll leave you with some tile humour. Well, it may be humour! Euphemistically speaking Duties will vary  Anyone in the office can boss you around. Must have an eye for detail  No quality assurance department. Career-minded  Female applicants must be childless (and remain so). Apply in person  If you’re old, fat, ugly or support Chelsea, the … Continue reading Tile Humour: Euphemistically Speaking

Tile Humour: On the road

I’m away on holiday until the 13th February, so I’ll leave you with some tile humour. Well, it may be humour! On the road On his first day on the road for Terror Cotter, new rep Owen David calls the office and asks for the sales manager. “I’ve got some good news and some bad news, sir.” “I’m busy. Just give me the good news!” … Continue reading Tile Humour: On the road

Tile Humour: Evaluation Day

I’m away on holiday until the 13th February, so I’ll leave you with some tile humour. Well, it may be humour! Evaluation day Many thanks for the kind reader who sent me the personnel records of Norfolk & Chance (Tiling Contractors). These staff evaluations confirm my faith in the high quality of the tradesmen attracted to the tiling industry, “Since my last report, this employee has … Continue reading Tile Humour: Evaluation Day

Tile Humour: You’ve Been Slapped

I’m away on holiday until the 13th February, so I’ll leave you with some tile humour. Well, it may be humour! You’ve been slapped Due to pressure from DIY sheds, we regret to inform you that The Self-Import Tile Co will be forced to reduce staff numbers. Under this plan, older employees will be asked to take early retirement, thus permitting the retention of younger people … Continue reading Tile Humour: You’ve Been Slapped